Saturday

7:45 a.m.- Awake, bright and early, despite the fact that there's no school today.

8:00 a.m.- Kid asks if he can have three waffles instead of two because there's three left in the pack and he doesn't want to have to eat just one tomorrow.

8:00 and 30 seconds a.m.- I consider his reasoning but then tell him no, he can only have two waffles because only two waffles fit in the toaster. I consider his acceptance of my shoddy reasoning a parenting victory.

8:05 a.m.- He eats one bite of one waffle, decides he feels sick and can't eat anymore.

8:30 a.m.- Kid is still feeling sick. I get worried that he may have caught the strep throat that I had last week and if we don't take care of it, I will be single handedly responsible for the illness of all children everywhere. Forever.

10:00 a.m.- Take kid to doctor's office. Pay $30 for them to tell me that he's fine.

12:00 p.m.- Baseball game. Only 8 kids show up from our team.

12:29 p.m.- My kid throws up in the outfield.

12:31 p.m.- I call doctor's office and demand my $30 back.

12:32 p.m.- They refuse. Ball, hit by one of my players, smacks me in back of head.

12:33 p.m.- Give team the classic "Try not to hit your coach with the ball while she's on the phone with the doctor's office instead of coaching the game" lecture. They've heard it before. They roll their eyes.

1:00 p.m.- Game over, take sick kid home. Let him watch Harry Potter and forget that you told him he had to clean his room today. Kid vows to be sick more often.

5:49 p.m.- Kid falls asleep three hours earlier than normal.

10:30 p.m.- Bedtime for me. Since he's sick, I'll let the kid sleep with me tonight, but first I wake him up and take him to the bathroom so he doesn't pee all over my bed.

10:31 p.m.- Instead of peeing in my bed, kid throws up in it. Day ends in vomit. All in all, a very typical Saturday.